Blow up doll
I have a blow up Doll called Floss.
I love her as she's not the boss.
She's the one I chose wares no cloths.
And I clean her with a Garden hose.
She dos'nt scratch, I love her snatch,
And I mend her with a plastic patch,
She's seldom seen really keen,
And I always know just ware she's been.
She's never late for a dinner date,
and there's only my manhood on her plate,
It's the thing she'll eat her special treat,
She cant read a menu so it's more treat for sweet.
She's never lonely nothing phony
And will never screw me for alimony,
I'm not sedated if it's not consumated,
No thret to my ego ---But Floss is deflated.
It dangles about- and sometimes sticks out
but most of the time you dont need it
but when your passions arise- it doubles in size
and you have an irresistable urge just to seize it
So they sat down one day- and thought of a way
and now nobody sees it
as we all dress in cloths -as it's rude to expose
but sometimes you just want to squeeze it
So pockets were added- and now you can grab it
but you still can only tease it
but cut the insides away -and now you can play
but you cant put your bloody keys in it
The world it has changed - no one has time
to find our friends we surfing on line
type information -build up a profile
find a good photo -of you with a smile
Typing to someone you found with your mouse
questions to find out if they have a spouse
they reply with a line- that Mark Warne might have texed
and the whole conversation is now- all about sex
Soon your both naked- they know what you like
then a sentence appers "have you got SKYPE"
you click on the vision -they look pretty hot
your web cam zooms in onto - all that you've got
You ask them to stand up bend over for fun
and now you can see that they have a great bum
you start to show them all your sex toys
and then demonstrait one thats just made for boys
Where will all this tecnology end?
Will computors email orgasms to friends?
from you in a pod thats a really snug fit
to you friend with a--"' Nanno-teck-wank-orgazz-anal-buss-bit,""
Last nigh I dreamt I was a girl for one day
Am I a transvestite? Or maybe I'm gay?
So when I woke up -I thought Iíll give it a shot
As I had a great time, - as a girl, - in the cot.
I wake up each morning - my dicks in the air
But early this morning - It just wasnít there
My hand moves up higher - up to my chest
To find a well rounded- hairless --nipple clad Brest.
I look in the mirror its a sight to be seen
I look at the place where my penis had been
With a trembling hand I reach down to my twat
And feel spasms of pleasure ---I really canít stop.
Spurred on by this feeling I head off to the store
To turn myself into a tramp or a hoar
No need for Knickers I need a guys Dick
To christen my sensitive wet little Clit
The workmen all whistle as I parade by
I wiggle my hips -- I'm a girl not a guy
I meet a black man - who's really persistent
To try out my brand new just run in equipment.
He rips off my cloths, and he probes with his tong
I suck on his dick and then swallow his cum
Its still hard and its throbbing so then I suggest
My brand new Virginia is put to the test
Iím well lubricated, -as its size is obscene
As it has to fit ware no others have been
My pussy is parted Ė I lay on my back
He pumps in more semen some leaks down my crack
It slips up my arse I kiss him and smile
Then I play with my clit then we fuck doggy style
But now I'm awake -- fuck I've been dreaming?
Then I find my Bum is all covered with Semen
I open my eyes and then I discover
That last night- I did have- a black man as a lover!!
I'd love to be a porn star --now that would make my day
I'd never take a sickly and Iíd work for very little pay
I'd crack a great big woody -I know I wont be shy
And with my big cock- I'd never stop- until both my balls run dry.
I line up at the auditions with all the other naked men
The test is to be erect upon the count of ten
Standing their- dick in the air -know that I have won
The others are all sent away- but I am told-- to cum!
I meet the other actors- and I use the word quite loosely
Bums and dicks --tits and clits-- which I will use profusely
Lights camera action -I cant believe my luck
It's going to be quite sore tonight---but I get paid to fuck!
The guys preform erotic acts -. They are a complete disgrace
Far too rude to write about --this far from my face
Instinctively I join in Ėand we all masturbate
The cameras have a close up shot- of my ejaculate
It's licked, Itís sucked, it penetrates, every single hole
The true porn star hear tonight--is my big pulsating pole
I wake up it was just a dream so real I could almost taste it
But in my hand --my throbbing cock , now Iíll masturbate it.
He's bloody well hung
I'll always remember the words my mother said
the day I was born- as she lay in her bed
as they handed me too her- here is your son
those words they still haunt me
He's bloody well hung.
At school I exposed it to all of the kids
the big ones all loved it- and I loved what they did
my schoolwork shrank- and I got lots of spankings
but it rapidly grew- from constantly wanking.
Over the years it grew and it grew
I still have trouble- sitting upon the loo
as it dangles down- into the water
thank god in winter, it hangs a lot shorter.
My teenage years were very depressing
I fell in love and when we were undressing
at the sight of my enormous willy
those terrible words -- "that slugger will kill me."
So now I find i"m still a virgin
I think i'll see the plastic surgeon
but bigger is better most people agree
so why alter a gift- that does a lot more than just pee.
Could it be useful - would anyone rent?
a tempory towel rail, or a pole for your tent?
but now i've found a dream job for my bit that"s exotic
It hangs out in films that are rated erotic.
8 hours foreplay
Everyone wankes off from time to time
I don"t really think--- I will go blind
I paint with my penis-- It's handled all day
randy as hell -it's had 8 hours foreplay.
A strange thing to do when you think about it
massaging you penis--- the sensitive bit
Use plenty of lube on the head ond the sides
the friction creates a big increase in size.
Look in the mirror--- -fuck it looks great!
I know I will cum soon- -as its getting late
there are tecniques I use to increase the feeling
and one to shoot semen --up to the ceiling.
I bend it right back till it in my bum crack
fondle my balls and stretch down the sack
to prolong the pleasure I let it go slack
then pump like a piston hey presto it's back.
That rushing sensatio now i am detecting
spasams of pleasure -- semen ejecting
Pump strongly now --- tense up feel the pain
wait 20 minuts - I can do it again .
Test tube babies and clowning so near
mans sexual future is now pretty clear
High teck dildo's are now all the rage
some marry vibrators-- and some-- just engage
Girls flirt at kindy boys are a bit shy
later at high school most give it a try
they marry have children and then make you sign
a devorce---keep your tool ----the rest is all mine !
Now she's creative--- lerning new ways to suck
things out of the question -when she gave you a fuck
a finger or two can substitute for a screw
finding new things --she can do--- with a shoe
The washing machine is a great place to sit
put your top in the wash and fondle a tit
nipples get harder as the rinse cycle kiks in
to orgasm --just wait--- for the trembling spin
Now me and my penis are obsolete
Vibrators and science have made wemon complete
so what's it for--- now I havn't a mate
I'll just pee with it -wank off - and use it to paint!!